The Flagrant Two

Thursday Afternoon Fantasy Trade Proposal Somehow Not Moving the Needle

An exasperated NBA fantasy league veteran has today declined his 7th straight low-ball offer from his friend’s overly enthusiastic younger brother.

The offer which came through at approximately 3:30pm AEDT, reportedly ruined the afternoon of Zac, the local twenty-three year old. His reasons for declining the offer are supposedly self-explanatory.

The trade marked the weeks culmination of low-ball offers from Josh (18), who rounded out the league at 10 teams.

Josh’s decision to draft Alex Caruso on a whim with the #1 pick is proving more of a problem than he anticipated. As a result, Josh is on a search for high end talent to propel “Team Westbrook Baptist Church” into the upper echelons of the league.

Team Westbrook Baptist Church Receives: Anthony Davis and Kyrie Irving.

Team Hamidou Me In The Ass Receives:  Kelly Olynyk, Harrison Barnes and Montrezl Harrell.

When questioned about the egregiously unbalanced trade Josh said “I think it’s fair, Harrison Barnes is going to bounce back and Montrezl is an all-star this year for sure!”.

Team Westbrook Baptist Church are currently 0-2 on the year with significant weaknesses at PG, SG, SF and C.

Josh declined to answer further questions but in his closing statement mentioned that he was unsure why Darren Collison and Nikola Mirotic hadn’t played thus far in the 2019/20 season.


Team Hamidou Me In The Ass currently sit atop the Western Conference in the young season. Zac is confident that he’ll be taking home the $95 prize for the leagues winner.

Zac’s girlfriend declined to comment on the quality of the trade offer but noted that their sex-life has shown significant decline ever since Zac’s increased interested in the Bill Simmon’s Podcast.

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